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Friday, August 9, 2013 3:37 AM
♥Slowly, I think I'm drifting from the right path. I really wish that you'll support me in my choice of career instead of pouring cold water and threatening. I wanted to join the SPF to you it seems like a choice of rush, and because of money. To me, it's more to I can afford to give you a better living, benefits, and it's like a passion. All I want is someone close to me support me, so I can actually do to strive better, but yea. After what you said, you only make me more insecure. So, what I can do is most prolly just give up the "SIGN ON" part and live with it. Hope to get a better job outside there. It's hard in the society as it's so much more competition. Everyone wants to be the best.
Thursday, April 25, 2013 12:57 AM
I don't know what I'm thinking. ♥3 yrs 10 months and counting.
I've to learn how to accept some facts that can't be avoided. She needs him?
I starting to feel insecure but what can I do? Everytime I tried to list out my unhappiness, she'll start to grunt about I don't trust her and stuff.
So from now, I'll just keep everything either here or to myself.
I've no idea what she does with him outside always, and I dun really wish to know too. It just breaks my heart even if I know that they are just outside together alone.
I've never felt so so so so so insecure before and I don't know why I'm like that. Maybe due to some previous factors that are affecting my feelings?
I love her a lot, and I admit, I've been too nice to her. I don't have any stand and opinion, and every opinion I made, to me, it just seems like I gonna hurt her.
I just wish that, one fine day, you'll understand my feelings and start to slowly disappear from him.
You said you don't have feelings for him. You said you don't love him. But from my POV, it doesn't seems that way sometimes. It just feel like, you always prioritize him more than me at times. IDK why too... Maybe is just me, my dumb feelings. TBH, I don't really find love anymore... I just feel that you're staying for the sake of staying and cause it's a 4 years long r/s and you don't wish to let it go.
How long can I hold? Sigh...
Fuck love. It just hurts me since I was 13. If this is gone, I might go around shattering people's heart, and let it be. I hate myself too... for letting you too much, and getting used to it..
I just need some security, that's all.. I suppose it's hard to gain... Once you lose it, wanting it back is twice as hard as you got it the first time.
Ruth, I do love you a lot, but I have my limit too. I'm not stopping you, but at least... please... I'm your bf... not him right? Sigh... maybe you're like day since day 1.....
TBH, i only go for a training and will try to be back asap, yet just few hours, you still wanna meet him and even go for a movie.
I'm still thinking whether what you said about I go army and you'll wait for me stuff, will it really happen... Sigh...
Monday, April 15, 2013 1:46 AM
Trust. ♥15/4/2013, 1:35am. I'm awake, and I've to wake up by 9 tmr to rush to tanah merah. It's not that I wanna check on her. I just want to see it with my own eyes whether things are positive or negative. I've been holding it to heart for years and I think it finally blasted to me. After this stupid girl, whom i nearly wanna flirt with actually give me a thought that no one may be serious in an r/s when money is involve. I wanted to flirt to clear my time, but at least it waked me up a bit. A long term relationship, most prolly because of my coco, this whole thing dragged for 3 years 10months. You went phuket with him, same room yet you state that you're on bed he's on floor. For me, I'll never let that to happen even she isn't my gf. I'll just take the opportunities to take advantage. Spending a bomb on you, even you're with me. Sure nothing is wrong between you both? Only you will know. You're drunk on 1/1/2013. You said Jason was a man who won't let u both anythin happen. If that's the case why won't he make a call to me and say you're drunk and ask me wait for you? Why must you go his home? Friends don't do that yea? He doesn't fucking treat u as a friend. I don't believe you drunk nothing is between you both. He's a fucking horny bastard, who is more horny than me, and you said something that makes a lot of sense, cos you compared between us thus losing all mood. Why do you compare? Cause you still got do with him? And I can feel it cos i've not been doing with u for almost a month yet you aren't tight. I know it myself, just that i subconsciously hid it. Girl, do you really love me? Or you just don't know how to open up to break with me thus dragged it? If you love me, I ask you to stop all those fucking contacts with him, will you do it for my sake? I doubt so. In club, u can do such thing with renew, what makes me think u won't do anything with him? Am I wrong to say that? Everything just piece up like a puzzle today. I hope tomorrow afternoon, I won't see anything that will breaks my heart till at teo heng. I love you therefore I'll be the one standing out to you today and make our things clear. I want a nice and positive relationship. And I'll be honest with you with everything too. I love you more than you can ever think. 15/4/2013 1:45am, Writing off.
Tuesday, January 29, 2013 11:35 AM
♥Since long I've blogged. Times fly past fast and soon it's new year. Have been hunting in RO2 quite recently due to getting some bloody card for my bebe.. = = hahaha No choice... she is despo for them hehe.. UT 2 have ended since yesterday and I'm so glad that it have ended. I think I really have to brush up on my IT security and IT service management. This 2 seems to be my weakest subject throughout all. FYP finished and handed in, hope everything goes successfully. If they feel a need to upload to SOI home, the only excuse I'll give is, they didn't state it at the start and I tried uploading on the day itself and found out that my header() wont work that well. Ohwell, blame school :D It's working very well on my personal site but not on their server side. No idea why. RO2, kinda boring but, only way to kill time... Hope that everything will goes well... :D
Sunday, January 13, 2013 11:25 PM
Sick ♥Was sick yesterday due to some flussss and coughing. Went to work still, but got deducted 2 hours of pay due to slacking (Never see phone is off). Fuck, I on all the fucking demo set when I reached. The phone was off-ed, my fault. -.- Owell, blame myself for being careless and nua-ing. No choice, not well, what can I do... Lol, hate to be sick when working. Vivocity starhub, or say vivocity, I swear when I'm working there, I'll be on vigilance from whatever timing I start work, till end work. Swear I won't work anymore whenever I sick, NO MATTER WHAT! Shucks to deduct 2 hours for some minor shits. Ok, next~. Took off for today, due to bad sore eye which lasted through the whole morning till ard 3pm? - - dafaq. Brought coco to groom with bebe, and she went to see a doctor, which got her a 3-day mc from today to tuesday. Sick sick sick, what a shitty day to b sick. Sigh... Tried to play RO2, but too lag, turn off and go. LOL Now playin hon for 1 last game before heading to bed and rest. Think the medicine is kicking up it's effect, feelin drowsy.. = = Good night all~
Thursday, January 10, 2013 3:13 PM
Tired ♥Been 4 day since I posted anything. So tired regards to FYP, Marketing proposals, Open House. Mon - Wed at open house from 9:30 - 6.. Omg so tiring LOL.. But at least it was quite fun, yet boring experience :X Additional 7 CCE points weee.. IIP going give 12 points, and left a few points to clear that dumb module. School reopen and was so boring of it.. Having exam tmr for marketing and all my notes are ready! Hope can do well for it, so that I won't disappoint the nice faci who treat us right and well. Lv 41 now and on going.. tons of 50 in the game already.. ): Ok once I hit 50, might train new char and enjoy ;p hahaha Will continue post with some nice pic whenever I can. Enjoy readers! :p
Sunday, January 6, 2013 2:50 AM
MIA ♥Hi readers, Didn't blogged for a few days, and woot happen??? I've been obsessed by the game RO2: LotS. Currently Lv 37 with my girl at 36 10k more exp to 37 (: Hmm not bad yeah...  Looks like spiderman :p HAHAHA Having not enough sleep for these 2 days ): Nearly died from lack of sleep.. RO2 having a server maintenance at 3am - 10am to allow cash shop to be open for all of us :D yay free 5k cash for everyone! Woohoo! Hope everyone who can played enjoy the game as much as I do (: Now playing 1 round of hon before sleeping... Good night readers :D |
Yours truly,  21(: 6th May 1991(: A life that have past thru thicks and thins. 788444753459 ♥ With Loves, My Story, Materialistic, Click for my wishlist!
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